Unconditional Self-Acceptance as the Path to Happiness and Success
Teresa started a business when she was 40 years old. She developed a new product that sold well over time and she and her customers were happy with it.
But when Teresa turned 50, she became unaccountably anxious and started having trouble sleeping. She came to me for HBLU therapy, and we discovered that the shock of turning 60 resulted in an inner dialog that said, “You are so old that you are running out of time to get your product out into the world as much as you had hoped. At this rate, you will die and all your hard work will be lost. What a shame that your contribution will not last after you are gone. You are a stupid, incompetent failure.”
I pointed out to Teresa that she was overly identified with her business and had lost perspective about her life as a whole. She had good health, a loving marriage, healthy successful children, and a successful business. Nobody looking at her from the outside would consider her a failure in any way, and she was putting unnecessary pressure on herself by making up an artificial standard of success. I suggested that Teresa float her soul out of her body, high above her life (somewhere between the stratosphere and the orbit of the moon) and look down upon her entire life span to realize that she was more than her work.
I explained to Teresa that in the three-dimensional embodied form, we are complex beings composed of a conscious mind, an unconscious mind, a body, an ego structure, and a soul. We all create an internal map of the world that is unique to each individual which we confuse with reality. Furthermore, we believe what we feel, even if we know it’s not true, and feelings run behavior.
At the highest spiritual level, and in the grand scheme of things, our souls are made of God-Source-creation energy, and we are capable of creating the reality and life we desire, In the embodied state we are consciously unaware that we are living in a map of illusions and misidentify our true selves with our feelings, behaviors, and experiences. In order to create the lives we want, we need to achieve a level of awareness of ourselves outside of the map.
It is in this state of higher consciousness and grace where we experience unconditional self-acceptance. There is no judgement or self-criticism because there are no ‘have-to’s.”
As Teresa floated above her life, she felt a sense of inner peace and was able to see that in the past when she set her mind to a long-term goal, she was eventually able to accomplish it even if events didn’t necessarily follow a linear path. She noticed that despite the zigs and zags she used her creativity and ability to learn from her experiences to eventually figure out a solution, and it was this path of growth and evolution that kept her engaged in life. Looking to the future, she realized that by continuing to use that strategy she would eventually succeed in bringing her business to the next level, and whatever happened it would be an interesting ride.
If you or anyone you know would like to expand your ability to accept yourself and others, HBLU methodology can help you. If you would like to silence that inner critic, we recommend you start by listening to our presentation, “Exchange Your Inner Critic for Compassion"
To learn more or schedule an appointment, please call 781-444-6940, or email info@hblu.org
Blessings, Judith
Copyright 2023 Judith A. Swack, Ph.D.
