Why We Repeat the Same Relationship Patterns | Dr Judith Swack on Unconscious Beliefs & Self-Worth
Why do we keep repeating the same painful relationship patterns, even when we desperately want things to change?
Have you ever found yourself attracting the same kind of relationship, making the same decisions or feeling trapped in patterns you can't explain? You know something isn't working, yet understanding it with your mind doesn't seem to be enough to change it.
In this episode of The Stone in My Shoe, Debbie Thompson sits down with Dr Judith Swack, biochemist, immunologist and creator of Healing from the Body Level Up (HBLU). After building a successful scientific career, Judith found herself asking a deeply personal question: "I'm a smart woman. Why can't I figure out why I keep attracting emotionally unavailable men?"
That question became the beginning of a journey that challenged everything she believed about healing.
Judith shares how growing up with abuse and neglect created unconscious beliefs that shaped every area of her life, from relationships to career. Rather than seeing trauma as simply something that happened in the past, she explains how the beliefs and protective strategies formed through those experiences continue influencing our choices long after the events themselves are over.
Together, Debbie and Judith explore the difference between the conscious and unconscious mind, why many people remain stuck despite years of personal development, and how healing begins when we recognise the invisible patterns we have been living by.
This is a thoughtful conversation about trauma, emotional healing, identity, purpose and learning to understand ourselves with both curiosity and compassion.
In this episode you'll hear:
- Why we unconsciously repeat the same relationship patterns.
- How childhood trauma shapes adult beliefs and behaviours.
- The hidden protective strategies that once kept us safe.
- Why understanding your mind isn't always enough to create change.
- The difference between conscious and unconscious healing.
- How emotions carry valuable information rather than simply getting in the way.
- Why hyper-independence often develops after childhood neglect.
- The role purpose, intuition and the body can play in healing.
- Why recognising your "stone" is often the first step towards lasting change.
Whether you're struggling with difficult relationships, healing from childhood trauma, questioning long-held beliefs or simply wondering why certain patterns keep showing up in your life, Judith's story offers a compassionate way of understanding what may be happening beneath the surface.
Sometimes the hardest part isn't changing.
It's seeing what has been quietly shaping us all along.
Connect with Dr Judith Swack
🌐 Website: https://www.hblu.org/
📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Healing-from-the-Body-Level-Up-HBLU-90737451478/
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hblu_drjudithswack/
💼 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/judith-a-swack-ph-d/
▶️ YouTube: https://www.linkedin.com/in/judith-a-swack-ph-d/
Connect with Debbie Thompson
📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thestoneinmyshoe/
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thestoneinmyshoe/
💼 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/debbie-thompson-b3b1b715/
▶️ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@stoneinmyshoepodcast
🌐 Website: https://debbiethompson.lovable.app/
If this conversation resonated with you, please follow the podcast, leave a review and share it with someone who may need to hear it. Every conversation helps another person recognise the stone that's been quietly shaping their own journey.
